Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Moved to WordPress

After WordPress have finally proven themselves to have a stable and regularly updated software, I have opted to move this blog to http://totalmansense.com .

Bear with me while I get it all sorted.

Skal!


Friday, April 8, 2016

Dan The Man Stage1



Why #mgtow #LOL

Sunday, June 28, 2015

Online Dating Advice - Your Profile



If you have good game, maybe.

Dating on the internet is like applying for a job. Your dating personal is much like a resume. In this article we will discuss online dating and how to use dating personals to provide precise information about who your are and what you are looking for.

Dating on the internet is like applying for a job. Your dating personal is much like a resume. In this article we will discuss online dating and how to use dating personals to provide precise information about who you are and what you are looking for.

Channel your inner alpha male. Here is the deal, many dating sites contain thousands and thousands of members. These are people who do not want to go to bars and take their chances finding a partner. Many of them are lonely and looking for companionship. Still others are professionals who are to busy to play the dating game.

So they join a dating service and go online looking for people to date. What do you do to get noticed?

1. Your dating personal is a profile about you. Unlike people who strengthen their resume to enhance their chances of getting a job, you owe it to your potential dating partners and yourself to be honest. If you stated that you have a lot to offer someone they need to know what you listed about yourself is the truth.

2. Spend as much time as you need to think about everything good about yourself that you can come up with. It all starts with a headline that catches the attention of a potential dating partner and draws them into your profile. You can do this without being corny. Headlines such as are you looking for a soul mate might be a little deep for someone browsing. My personal favorite was "Runs With Scissors", it suggests an edginess and a sense of humor.
Online Dating Advice

3. You see dating personals in the newspaper and in a magazine. Reading those personals can give you an idea on how to write a good one yourself. Being interesting will help make a person want to get to know you. Keep it light, not too many personal details and please, no drama or bashing your former dating life/ exes. Inject some humor and happiness.

4. We talked about being honest, but you should also be factual. Stating facts take the emotion out of writing a personal which is good. If you have climbed Mount Everest by all means let everyone know. These are the type of things that can help you stand out. Keep your profile as unique as you are - here is one I used back in the day:

"You found me. Here I am, just testing the waters to see who is out there. I really enjoy meeting people in the real world but am giving online a try. I'd like to find that beautiful type of relationship where life can be shared on a deeper level. I’m looking for someone who is genuine, intelligent and has a good sense of humor - being genuine is very important for me. An ideal long-term relationship is easy to maintain, involves lively discussions, engages our friends and family around us, contains laughter and a mutual pursuit of our passions.

I am smart, fun, authentic, affectionate, and love to try new things. You could say that I am a true "man's man", with my priorities in order and I know how to treat a lady. I balance professionalism and fun in all of life's adventures. I work hard and am very close with my family and friends.

At work I'm creative and driven. I've founded my own business and have ideas for a few more. I get to do many creative things, and love every second of it. Few things are more rewarding then bringing your own idea to life.

I'm always up for trying new things and rarely afraid to take risks in life. In fact, I thrive on it. 

A perfect night for me is getting my family together and cooking a nice dinner for everyone. I try to always remain positive and be in a good mood. I like to go out and have a good meal over stimulating conversation. In terms of going on dates, I am not very hard to please. As long as I am spending quality time with my significant other, I am a happy guy. I believe in karma and that you should always treat others how you would like to be treated. 

I am looking for a a woman who is fun loving and spontaneous. Some other characteristics I am looking for include: independence, sense of humor, career driven and trustworthy. 

I've  traveled many places and, while I don't travel as much now, I will for the right person. Do you love to travel too?

Write me if you have any level of interest... Let's see where it goes. I love a woman who initiates."

Online Dating Advice Your Profile
Most people are a bit hesitant to post personals or meet someone who has advertised in them, for fear that the person could be a stalker or even worse. Although people have to be careful when it comes to blind dates, those who place personal ads are basically people looking for some company.

Internet dating can help by doing screening of their members before they let them create a profile. This is the place to find online dating personals today. Go online and create a good one of yourself. Then start looking for ones that appeal to you.



Simple enough, right? Makes Total ManSense to me.

Saturday, April 18, 2015

How To Be An Alpha Male

Are You This Cool?

What is an Alpha Male?

Let me start out by saying that I kind of hate the term "alpha male" because so many attributes have been used to define it. Definitions run from arrogant, cocky womanizer to leader of a company or business.

In 48 years of gracing the face of this planet I have seen the good, the bad, the ugly, the Bullshit.

I'm shooting for the quintessential Man's Man, very simply just being a man. No false pretenses, just the basics. If you can be just a man, you're going to be fine. Maybe nobody has modeled this for you or you're still confused about being a man, I'm here to help.

Happiness


On the top of the list of being a man, an Alpha in my experience and view, is that he is happy on a regular basis.

He's knocking happiness out of the park at somewhere around 95%. Does he get discouraged? Sure, but he doesn't sit around and whine about it, he sucks it up, processes it, makes a decision and surges ahead like a tidal wave on crack. That's it, Leave it there, dwell on the unhappy business no longer. Man up, move on.

How does he get there? Practice. Practice accepting things as they are without getting bent out of shape at every turn. Practice. I can't say it enough. Make up your mind that you're life isn't ruined over trivial matters especially where something is out of your span of control. Adopt the attitude of survival, indifference or whatever feels like the right frame of mind. Do this repeatedly and you will become capable of reacting appropriately at every instance.

Masculinity

What is it to be male? Typical attributes would be strength, determination, courage, bravery, ever present, consistent, loyal and other historically known virtues ascribed to manhood. Think of a knight if that helps without going crazy on the chivalry, we'll address that in another post. You're a real man, act like it without the simpering neediness seen today in probably 85% of the male population.
Can You Pull This Shit Off? Sure You Can.

Confidence

Confidence is going boldly forward like the badass you should be. Not aggressive or cocky - confident. You got your shit together, you feel this way because you have a mission, goals, ambition. Women love this by the way. If you don't have some ambition or drive/ purpose then find it, Are you the next technology guru like Steve Jobs? A financier like Warren Buffet? An awesome front man in a band? Find it, think about it, get excited, just damn do it. Stick with it and breathe it in and out every day. Just having some focus on your drive will give you confidence. Do it.

Amplitude

He lives an abundant life, not one thing is missing: money, sex, excitement, mayhem - it's all there for the taking and he has already taken it. He feels it right to his marrow and he's still piling it on. How is he doing that? Attitude = Amplitude.  As you believe and act on it, so mote it be. The simplest and best place you can be at anytime is in the right freaking NOW. Here's an exercise for you: say you're in a snit over the latest shit test your date/ girlfriend, whatever has just pulled. You got your indignation on Kill and your look on Stun. Take a breath and ask yourself this: "At this moment in time, right now, this very second - what is lacking?". Nothing. You have bills, you have drama, what have you but right THEN, right NOW you will find nothing is lacking. Adopt this mindset right away. Use the exercise and the concept will grow in you. Stress Remediation Level: Expert.

William Wallace Stuff

Freedom

Ah sweet freedom! Today's Alpha isn't constrained by traditional dating/ relationship rules, employment, marriages, politics or much of anything.

He operates within the law because not doing so would land him in trouble and therefore interfere with Freedom and Happiness.

Taking pleasure in making his own way on his own terms, he owns the day without fear of societal programming, stigma or bitch fest from the rest of the world.

Suggestions: if you are coming out of a relationship be it girlfriend, marriage, FB, whatever you have going on then you need to take a step back for a while and look inward at these 5 traits presented, Do you still have all 5 boiling over? Then move forward, my son, and conquer! If not, take that time and make some space for yourself, Find all of the missing pieces you had and put it back together before doing anything resembling a relationship.

Find your drive, get a job if you're unemployed, get out of your parents' house for Pete's sake - you aren't still living at home at 25 are you? If you are, get your ass in gear and get your own digs.

If you think about it, it's not so hard to be a man, it makes Total ManSense.

Peace

Sunday, March 29, 2015

10 More Reasons Guys Break Up With Girlfriends

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do
Men, if you've had your heart broken you're really going to relate to this one, my second article on men breaking up with 

women. Your mileage may vary but you'll see these common factors as reported by men - reasons he dumped his girlfriend.

Ladies, this is a good time to listen if you've faced this problem.





1. She doesn't listen. 
When a man says something in the forest and no woman is around to hear him, is he still wrong? When a guy is talking, give him a chance to speak his mind without interruption. Listen to what he says as in actually hearing, processing and considering what he's saying. One common problem today is a man is made to feel that he doesn't know what he's talking about. Men may not always be right, but we do have opinions, and it frustrates us to no end when you act like our opinion doesn't matter. Why would he stay with you?

2. Friends weigh in too much. 
Cool, you have a galpal/confidant, maybe several, we get it. We have buddies we confide in as well. We can go with the girls' night out deal if it's not more common than your time spent with us. When you start letting your buddies (who constantly run guys off or have recurring relationship problems) get into the business of your relationship, that's asking for trouble. You expect that your man has a mind of his own when he's out with the guys, right? Same expectation for you. Just be careful what you decide to bring back from those conversations.

3. All in the family. 
We like when you are close to your family and we're not trying to monopolize the time you want to spend with them. This isn't a kidnapping. Here's the thing: you left the nest (you are old enough to do this, right?) so let's keep what goes between us just between us, ok? If you tell your mom and your sisters about every single argument and disagreement that we have, you're setting us up for dirty looks, skewed opinions and limited potential for our ability to enjoy visiting them with you.

4. We're not conjoined twins. 
There's no need for us to go every single place that you go, and we don't expect you to go everywhere with us. That's what makes our time together special. We each had our own likes and dislikes before we met. You did things alone or with your girls, and that's fine. Don't try to drag your man with you if it's going to be nothing but you and the girls talking. We don't want to sit and listen to talk about hair, nails, fashion, who's man is cheating on who, etc. Just shoot us first, if that's the case.

5. We aren't in prison or on parole.
Parolees have to give an account of where they're going, where they've been and with whom pretty much continually. Parole officers check to see if the parolees actually report to work. Relationships are supposed to have more trust than that. If a man feels that he's not being trusted, and he hasn't done anything deserving of the interrogation process (Bad Cop), then don't expect to have him around too much longer. We usually see this trait among the insanely jealous. Having said that, if there's going to be a delay for a good reason we'll let you know out of courtesy and to ease your concern and you should do the same.

6. Miss Independent.
Call it ego, male insecurity, whatever you like. We're in it for more than just sex. Seriously. Let us do some man stuff - was that misogynistic? If you keep telling a man (and showing him, too) that you can do everything on your own, then what do you need him for? Now we wonder if it's about money - what? Give us a hand up here with the ego, didn't we just tell you that you look gorgeous?

7. Cling Wrap.
We do want a grown woman who can handle her business, but still let us know that there's a place in her life for us that only we can fill. You're not a child (or do you act like one?), and we don't expect to treat you like one or take care of you like one. If you come to a guy for every single thing and can't seem to make up your mind or make simple decisions ... well, one day he make make up his mind and not come back. That's not a contradiction to #6. If it is for you, reread it until it makes sense.

8. If you can't say anything nice.
Sure, we mess up from time to time (sometimes in close time intervals). But how about some props now and then? Can't your man do anything right? We're not talking about being patronizing or treating him like a kindergarden kid keeping his colors inside the lines ("Way to go, Donnie!"). There's not a sentient person alive who can stand always being criticized, put down in front of others, etc. Shrinks call this "positive reinforcement." Men call it "give us a break." We want you to support us and be our cheerleader (outfit optional).

9. Back to the future. 
We've all made mistakes. The thing is to learn from them, not live in them. If your man made a mistake, and you've agreed to forgive him for it, then do that. Get over it, you don't have to reload that ammo for every conflict. Don't bring it up and keep beating him over the head with it.
get some original material. If you keep bringing up the past then be prepared to talk about your man
in the past tense, as in "ex."

10. His friends.
Don't throw them under the bus with your boyfriend drama. They may not be your friends, but don't dog them out. He knew them before he knew you. He knows how they are. If one (or more) of his friends are players, he knows this already. You don't have to remind him of that. If you insist on making negative comments about them, what you're really doing is showing your insecurity and, in a more subtle way, expressing a lack of trust. If he's with you and everything is going right then don't sweat his friends.

Sunday, March 22, 2015

Misogyny and Misandry Part I Misogyny

Misogyny Sucks
Part 1 of 2. Ok folks, let's look at these problems at a very simple level. There's a war being waged out there between the sexes.

Misongyny, at its base level is a very narrow view of, ingrained in every decision and butthurt driven dislike and sometimes outright hatred of women.

The current movement seems to be going in two main directions for men disenfranchised with feminism (they will usually say RADICAL feminism) and Western women in general.

First, there's MGTOW - Men Going their Own Way. These gentlemen typically, but not always, choose to disavow dating and any unnecessary contact with women - their emotions and sometimes bank accounts having been burned to rubbish by one or several bad choices in a partner. I would place myself almost there were it not for a handful of ladies I feel pretty certain wouldn't act with malice regarding their male partner (yes, I made some bad choices). The MGTOW movement in concert with other Men's Rights Activists (MRAs) are experiencing a huge surge in popularity. What this means for Western Society is a sharp decline in marriage rates, having children, monogamy and fidelity (read family and kids). From a population standpoint, this isn't a good thing. For the man scorned, it's a win and freedom from drama, responsibility and a shield for his emotional state. I'm not advocating marriage, mind you, not at all. Do a YouTube search for MGTOW to see the current thought.

Most MGTOW men will point out the double standards they feel are placed on them - it's okay for women to belittle men, make them look like idiots and toss them aside when they aren't getting what they want. I agree and I get it. Men are expected to be in touch with their feminine side but tolerate the rough, arrogant snipes from women. Been there, got the t-shirt and even that was the wrong size.

The second branch deIdiot running rampant is PUA (pick up artist) and "game". The idea behind game being maximize the potential for sexual encounters by building a harem and building it with manly artistry. It's all about the guys hardcore with this crowd and don't dare contradict them lest they gang up on you like a zebra corpse in front of hyenas. I have that t-shirt too, also the wrong size.
Jeans and t-shirt kind of guy

A bevy of assorted pickup tactics, lines, rules and opinion rule the day and they have their Godfathers - Roosh V (Google that name long with PUA and game) is one. One of the biggest sites supporting this agenda is ReturnOfKings.com, They have some decent life hacks and occasionally decent advice but under nearly EVERY article and thread runs the dark, oily undercurrent of the He Man's Woman Hater Club.

Why? Well, for the reasons I delineated for MGTOW and because they aren't getting their way. It's that simple. I have to agree with some of their thoughts: don't let a woman run over top of you, don't let her change you, dictate your hair style, choose your friends, get rid of your habits - but those things are good advice for any relationship, it's not specific to only women. This is just good advice in general when dealing with people. No, I can't align myself here either.

What's the solution? For those of you old enough to understand the Golden Rule it's easy: treat others the way you want to be treated. Always. If someone doesn't give you that respect regularly - walk. The strongest position you can be in is the same as in business - the ability to walk away. I'm not saying break up with your woman or man if they get a little out of range but if you get a steady diet of that crap, it's time to go. Save yourself.

Part 2 soon but it's going to end the same way,

Be excellent to each other.

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Female Privilege - California Planet Fitness Told Woman To Cover Up Her Toned Body!


From the article: "Tiffany Austin (pictured) claims to have felt much “gymtimidation” at a Planet Fitness in Richmond, Calif., after she was allegedly ordered by the gym’s staff to cover up her toned body because it was intimidating to other patrons, according to HLN.

The Los Angeles vocalist and lyricist said she was pacing herself on a treadmill during her first visit to the gym on Monday when she was suddenly approached by the gym’s employees who informed her about complaints from other members over her ‘toned physique.’  Austin, who was wearing pink capri pants and a matching midriff, told HLN, “The first worker said, ‘You’re intimidating people with your toned body, your toned physique.’ If I’m intimidating someone I thought I had to be harassing them or something. I’m like, wow, just being who I am is an infraction of some sort?”
The employee then allegedly offered Austin a shirt, which she accepted, so that she could cover up her body.
The confrontation did not stop at the shirt exchange. “In rapid succession, the second one [staffer] came after I had already agreed to put on the shirt,” she said. “Then I said, you know what, give me my money back.”

The fledgling Matriarchy cried foul over the issue but guess what? Austin’s toned body was not the issue that prompted the disagreement. It was her outfit, which went against the gym’s dress code policy. 

"'In this particular instance, club staff received complaints from several members about Ms. Austin’s attire,' McCall Gosselin, spokeswoman for Planet Fitness, told HLN in an e-mail Wednesday. "As a result, a staff member informed her of the dress code policy and also offered to provide her with a free T-shirt to complete her workout. Planet Fitness’ dress code policy is based solely on attire and not physique, as members of all shapes and sizes are welcome in our clubs.”
Austin, on the other hand, feels she was appropriately dressed for the “judgement-free zone” gym, attired in clothing that was not very revealing except for the fact that her midriff was exposed."

Here is that common thought amongst the entitled (female privilege) - "I see your policy but I think my opinion supercedes your policy". To be fair, there should be an inquiry on what "intimidated" means to the other gym members who contacted the staff member. Regardless of that, it's a policy. Your opinion is trumped in that place.

Fortunately, Austin was offered membership elsewhere to bare her midriff. Better check those hidden equipment, towel laundering and start up fees - they're probably policy.

Knowing what you're up against at the gym or elsewhere - makes Total ManSense to me.